Loved ones gather to memorialize American-Israeli soldier Omer Neutra

by Jackie Hajdenberg

(New York Jewish Week) — Omer Neutra was killed more than one year ago, more than 5,000 miles away. But at his memorial service held December 2nd on Long Island, the sanctuary overflowed with relatives, friends, Jewish leaders and at least one other hostage family.

Coursing through the crowd was the pain of learning — after nearly 14 months of unending hope and activism — that Neutra had been killed in battle alongside his fellow Israeli soldiers on Oct. 7, 2023, the day Hamas terrorists abducted his body to Gaza. It is still being held there.

“I pled for a sign of life; I didn’t get any,” said Orna Neutra, Omer’s mother, during the service at the Midway Jewish Center, a Conservative synagogue in Syosset, New York. “Instead, we received, on a daily basis for over 423 days, signs of hope and love: notes in our mailbox, flowers, meals, prayers for Omer and good deeds and thoughts from all over the world.”

She recalled the feeling of her son’s bear hugs.

“For over a year now, we’ve been breathing life into your being, my beautiful boy, with no physical sign back from you, but with hope and love of so many, we kept going and going, keeping you alive, speaking your name from every outlet and every stage, pushing away any hint of despair, not stopping to breathe or to take in the deep pain of your absence.”

Orna and Ronen Neutra, Omer’s father, have been among the most prominent activists in the movement to free the hostages held by Hamas in Gaza, of whom roughly 100, living and dead, remain captive. They traversed continents, spoke with President Joe Biden and President-elect Donald Trump, and appeared at the Republican convention in addition to many other venues.

They were joined at the memorial ceremony by Rachel Goldberg and Jon Polin, the parents of another American-Israeli hostage, Hersh Goldberg-Polin, who have also been among the most visible advocates globally for the hostages’ release. Goldberg-Polin and five other hostages were killed in captivity at the end of August; hostage families have called on Israeli leaders to make a deal for their release, so that the same fate does not befall those who are still alive.

“They did what they could, but they were taken hostage, and now it’s Israel’s turn to show its love and get him and all his team and everybody else back with more [than] 100 hostages still there,” Ronen Neutra said at the service. “One hundred-and-one families are craving, like us, to get them back.”

The family sat shiva Tuesday to Thursday in Long Island, and will complete the weeklong mourning period in Israel.

Also in attendance were ADL CEO Jonathan Greenblatt; Nassau County lawmaker Mazi Pilip, an Israeli-American who ran for Congress earlier this year; and New York Gov. Kathy Hochul, who ordered all New York State flags to be flown at half-staff Tuesday in Neutra’s memory.

Neutra, who was 21 when he was killed, grew up on Long Island, and attended Jewish day school and camp. Speakers recalled childhood memories of him: a banana costume he wore in fifth grade, his affection for the Knicks, and his penchant for competing to eat the last slice of pizza.

Alyssa Mendelowitz, who became friends with Neutra in first grade, recalled sitting across from him in a 10-person Hebrew class.

“I did not only want to listen to whatever Omer Neutra had to say, but I wanted to find a way to learn from him and become more like him,” Mendelowitz said. “To me, Omer wasn’t just a classmate or close friend. He was someone that challenged me to want to do more and be better.”

Wearing a jacket that was once Omer’s, his younger brother Daniel lamented that he would soon be older than his brother will ever be.

“I have to grow old without him by my side,” Daniel Neutra said. “At least when I have to explain to my children and grandchildren who Omer was, I will have thousands of interviews, articles and documentaries to reference.”

Hanging over Tuesday’s service was the shadow of that long effort, and the realization that Omer would not be returning to his home an ocean away.

“The truth is that we prayed, and the truth is that we davened, and the truth is that we sounded the shofar to crash the heavens, and the truth is that we lit extra Shabbat candles,” said Midway’s Rabbi Joel Levinson. “And the truth is that we wanted a different end to this story.”

On December 1 following the announcement that Neutra died in Hamas’ Oct. 7, 2023, attack, Omer’s parents and brother appealed to President Joe Biden and President-elect Donald Trump to bring about the release of the remaining hostages.

“It was an unimaginable nightmare to be acting based on the hope that he was alive, despite having little information or signs of life since he was seen on video being taken on October 7th,” Ronen and Orna Neutra, his parents, and Daniel, his brother, said in a statement on Monday, following the Israeli military’s announcement of his death. Neutra, an Israeli tank commander, was killed in battle during the Oct. 7 attack.

“In the 423 days since October 7th, we expected our leaders to demonstrate the same courage displayed so bravely by Omer and rise to the occasion on behalf of those who were killed and kidnapped, just as our beloved Omer showed until the very end,” continued the statement from the family, who live in Long Island. “While we appreciate the support we have received from so many in our community, in New York, in Israel and across the world, the feeling today is very difficult. The grief is heavy.”

The Neutras have been among the most prominent families advocating for the hostages’ release, and spoke at the Republican National Convention in July. Their statement Monday included an appeal for leadership, both to the outgoing president and the incoming one.

“Sadly, time has run out to bring Omer home alive and words alone have no power to comfort,” the statement said. “Leadership will only be revealed in actions and results going forward. We call upon the Israeli government to work with President Biden and President-elect Trump, to use all of their leverage and resources to return all 101 hostages — living and the deceased — to their families as soon as possible.”

Following the news of Neutra’s killing, Trump said there would be “all hell to pay in the Middle East” if the hostages are not released by his Jan. 20 inauguration. Biden said he was “devastated and outraged” by Neutra’s killing and pledged, “I will not stop working to bring your loved ones back home where they belong.”